there are so many ups and downs right now. my life is an emotion rollercoaster.

some days feel so good, so perfectly set into place, no worries no stress no nothing.

and then sometimes deranged thoughts and feelings flood my skull and everything is flipped totally upside down. i guess i would rather be experiencing these ups and downs then to just feel the negative aspect. however i would like things to start subsiding only in the good areas of my life.

one thing that i would like to throw out there is that i don't enjoy having to apologize for who i am, unless i am purposefully hurting others that i care about, which i don't do. but my day to day actions, how i react to things, simply how i function and how i live my life, i don't want to feel the need to say sorry for these things. sometimes i'm wild and crazy, i'm rambunctious and i make quite a lot of noise. and other days im reclusive and depressed. i don't know. i'm not saying being depressed is a good thing but it makes me feel worse when people complain about it. i mean i have people that love me for who i am. my group of friends may not agree with every decision that i make, but i know they will always be there for me at the end of the day. and thats why i love them. i'm not saying sorry anymore. i'm not worrying about what people think. especially considering the people i'm worrying about don't, and won't ever truly matter in my life.

fin.

i need money to go shopping. bye.